we are (hopefully) not pessimistic space cadets.

infinity is now.

my brother and i decided this today.

if infinity exists before us and after us and time is irrelevant, then infinity is now.

and now.

and now.

and now.

and we are infinite.

not in our shape. not in who we are. not what we are. but what we are made of. the neutrons and electrons and protons that comprise our body will be traded to the earth and its creatures for our decomposition. and we are infinite.

we are infinite because the events and people that came before us. without them...we are not. we are infinite because of our future. our possibilities. our potential.

we have class together (Christopher and I) and much of the conversation is in regards to how we know that we know. and if the more we "know", we realize that we really know nothing at all, then what is the point in trying to "know" anything?

are we doomed to be pessimistic space cadets?

maybe, but I think there is another option.

maybe the more we "know", and the more we realize we really know nothing at all, then the more we realize how much we can consume. maybe we have the opportunity to "know" (or at least try to have some sort of idea) about so much more then we initially assumed.

maybe the possibilities for knowledge are...infinite.

"hello goodbye?"

tonight on my way to the coffee shop, "lemonjellos", where I am sitting right now, i passed a lady on the stairs of my apartment. she said, "hello" and asked how i was. i replied, "good."

now here's the strange part.

after i said, "good", she said, "good thanks."

the unusual part of this conversation wasn't that she was good, but that i had never asked her how she was. i never said, "and how are you?" she just assumed that i would ask. interesting isn't it? and i don't that she even realized what she had said. i think she was just on auto pilot.

isn't it strange? how easily we walk through life without even noticing things or truly interacting? our questions and responses are simply dictated by the norms of society. we don't think about our words until they are flying, hurdling, tumbling out of our mouths with no chance of ever catching them again. our tongues have been set loose without restraint. we speak. we scream. we declare. we proclaim. we whisper. but we never think. how strange. we have lost the ability to think. or maybe not so much the ability to think, but rather to prioritize. we have placed speaking in front of intelligent thought.

i hope i'm not just hurdling through this life on autopilot. i hope i'm looking around. i hope i'm making real friendships and real relationships with real conversations. i hope i'm living my life in a way that acknowledges that i'm alive. i hope that i'm living in a way that shows real love. real faith. real christianity. a real God.

oh i hope and pray so.

enough is enough.

seriously. i am so fed up with the state of this region, this country, and this world.

Rwanda the 1994 genocides: 800,000 murdered

Uganda in The past 20 years: 150,000 murdered and counting...

Sudan the Darfur Massacres & genocide (last count in 2006): at least 500,000 murdered and counting...

Europe (the Holocaust): 11 million people murdered

Why do we stand for these things?!? We have, and continue to sit back and watch theses events unfold. See, it's not that we ignore them, but that we are apathetic towards them. We say, "My God, how horrific!", then we continue with our day, our class, our dinner, we change the channel. We know these atrocities occur, and we continue to ignore them!

I do not not understand how we, as Christians, ...for goodness sakes, as fellow human beings, can see these things and not act immediatly! How do our hearts not burst at the injustice!?! How do we justify these events in our minds, in our hearts, in our souls?!?

What is Faith without action? If this apathy and ignorance is what "Christianity" has become, then I want no part in it. You may call me a follower of Christ, and I will chase passionatly after him, and I surrender my life to his will, but I will not partake in this apathy any longer. I am done with it. I am done with our ridiculous excuses for ignorance. I am done. I will not stand for this any longer. I will not tolerate my own, or anyone elses excuses for living a life half committed to my creator. I will not be a participant in this stagnant faith.

My faith will be real. My faith will be honest. My faith will be hard. It will not come easily. My faith may cost me comforts, social acceptance, a safe home, and even my life.

But I WILL have a REAL faith.

I will not be ignorant.

I will not be apathetic.

I will not allow you to make following Jesus a fad or a comforting dream.

Following Jesus is not comfortable. It is not easy. It is not about this life. It has a price. The price of your entire life.

NOTHING LESS.

enough is enough.

take a stand.

enough is enough.